Erika Kirk

Much has been said about Erika Kirk’s compelling address at the memorial service for her husband, Charlie Kirk, held on Sunday September 21, 2025, at the State Farm Stadium in Glendale, Arizona. Most of the attention has been focused on her statement that she has forgiven the man who took her husband’s life without cause and in cold blood just as Jesus asked God to forgive those who were active in effectuating Jesus’ crucifixion.  There has been almost universal praise and admiration for this statement by Erika from fellow Christians and non-Christians alike. Even Jimmy Kimmel took positive note of this statement by Erika on the night he returned to his late-night television show following his earlier suspension for previous intemperate comments made about the assassination of Charlie Kirk. I too was very much touched by Erika’s statement of forgiveness as I doubted that I could say and do what she did following such a horrific act of evil. With that said, I want to discuss another topic which Erika touched on which has not received as much publicity.

Amidst her grief and pain and expression of forgiveness toward her husband’s assassin, Erika also discussed her marriage relationship with her deceased husband. Erika’s discussion was largely based on the Apostle Paul’s instruction for husbands and wives set forth in Ephesians 5:22-33. In summary, the core teaching of this Scripture emphasizes the obligation of the wife to submit to her husband and the obligation of the husband to love his wife in the same way Christ loved the church and gave his life for the church. To be sure, in today’s secular society, these words are countercultural, radioactive and quickly and derisively dismissed in many quarters as patriarchal, out of date, and even an attack against women. In fact, many Evangelical pastors are reluctant to preach on this Scripture for fear of the negative reaction they may receive from their congregants for what is deemed to be a politically and socially incorrect message in today’s culture. This is truly unfortunate. Thankfully, my wife, Cathy, and I have had the honor and privilege of hearing from Bob Russell, the senior pastor at our former church and Greg Gilbert, the senior pastor at our current church, who have both preached and taught accurately and courageously on this Scripture. We have been greatly blessed by this experience.

Erika fleshed out the application of this Scripture in a way which is practical and easily understood. I believe it provides a helpful template for Christian couples. I will attempt to summarize below the key points from Erika’s discussion.

Erika encouraged women to be virtuous by being the guardians, encouragers, and the preservers in the home and to make the home a place where the husband always desires to return. Even though she was actively involved in the Touch Point USA ministry led by her husband and is now the new leader for this ministry following her husband’s assassination, she made it clear that her role of being a mother is the most important ministry a woman can ever have. But Erika had an equally strong and compelling message for husbands. She implored men to embrace true manhood. This would require being a strong and courageous presence for their families; loving and leading their wives; and loving their children and protecting them. She also emphasized that husbands should take point in being the spiritual leader of the home. This would always require husbands to be a leader worth following by never treating their wives as a servant, employee, or a slave.

As I stated above, Erika’s words are simple and easy to understand but require Christian husbands and wives to recognize and overcome the challenge and opposition which the prevailing culture presents to this approach for marriage. I am confident that God will bless the efforts of Christian husbands and wives who seek God’s grace and strength to live out Erika’s message in their marriage.

God bless you and thank you for the privilege of your time in reading my blog.